The Mutual Rights of Husband and Wife.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

In Islam the marriage of a man and a woman is not just a financial and physical arrangement of living together but a sacred contract, a gift of Allah, to lead a happy, enjoyable life and continue the lineage. The main goal of marriage in Islam is the realization of tranquility and compassions between the spouses. For the attainment of this supreme goal, Islam defined certain duties and rights for the husband and wife.

Piety is the basis of choosing the life partner. Many are the statements of the Qur'an and the Sunnah that prescribe kindness and equity, compassion and love, sympathy and consideration, patience and good will. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, says, "The best Muslim is the one who is best to his family." Also, he says, "… and the most blessed joy in life is a good, righteous wife." [Reported by At-Tirmidzi]

The role of the husband revolves around the moral principle that it is his solemn duty to Allah to treat his wife with kindness, honor, and patience; to keep her honorably or free her from the marital bond honorably; and to cause her no harm or grief. Allah Almighty says: "…consort with them in kindness, for if ye hate them it may happen that ye hate a thing wherein Allah hath placed much good." [An-Nisa', 4: 19]

The role of the wife is summarized in the verse that women have rights even as they have duties, according to what is equitable; but men have a degree over them. Allah Almighty says, "And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them in kindness, and men are a degree above them. Allah is Mighty, Wise." [Al-Baqarah, 2: 228]

This degree is usually interpreted by Muslim scholars in conjunction with another passage which states, among other things, that men are trustees, guardians, and protectors of women because Allah has made some of them excel others and because men expend of their means. Allah Almighty says: "Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath men the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High Exalted, Great." [An-Nisa', 4: 34]

A-The Wife's Rights; The Husband's Obligations:

The Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet s.a.w, have commanded kindness to women, it is the husband's duty to:

1- Consort with his wife in an equitable and kind manner. Allah Almighty says, "… and consort with them in kindness." [An-Nisa', 4: 19]

2- Have responsibility for the full maintenance of the wife, a duty which he must discharge cheerfully, without reproach, injury, or condescendence. Allah Almighty says: "Let him who hath abundance spend of his abundance, and he whose provision is measured, let him spend of that which Allah hath given him. Allah asketh naught of any soul save that which He hath given it. Allah will vouchsafe, after hardship, ease.‏" [At-Talaq, 65: 7]

Components of Maintenance:

Maintenance entails the wife's incontestable right to lodging, clothing, nourishing, and general care and well-being.

1-The wife's residence must be adequate so as to provide her with the reasonable level of privacy, comfort, and independence. The welfare of the wife and the stability of the marriage should be the ultimate goal.

2-What is true of the residence is true of clothing, food, and general care. The wife has the right to be clothed, fed, and cared for by the husband, in accordance with his means and her style of life. These rights are to be exercised without extravagance or miserliness.

Non-Material Rights:

A husband is commanded by the law of Allah to:

1- Treat his wife with equity.

2- Respect her feelings, and to show her kindness and consideration.

3- Not to show his wife any aversion or to subject her to suspense or uncertainty.

4- Not to keep his wife with the intention of inflicting harm on her or hindering her freedom.

5- Let her demand freedom from the marital bond, if he has no love or sympathy for her.

B. The Wife's Obligations; The Husband's Rights:

The main obligation of the wife as a partner in a marital relationship is to contribute to the success and blissfulness of the marriage as much as possible. She must be attentive to the comfort and well-being of her mate. She may neither offend him nor hurt his feelings. Perhaps nothing can illustrate the point better than the Qur'anic statement which describes the righteous people as those who pray saying: "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the joy and the comfort of our eyes, and guide us to be models of righteousness.” [Al-Furqan, 25: 74]

This is the basis on which all the wife's obligations rest and from which they flow. To fulfill this basic obligation:

1- The wife must be faithful, trustworthy, and honest.

2- She must not deceive her mate by deliberately avoiding conception lest it deprive him of legitimate progeny.

3- She must not allow any other person to have access to that which is exclusively the husband's right, i.e. sexual intimacy.

4-She must not receive anyone in his home whom the husband does not like.

5-She may not accept their gifts without his approval. This is probably meant to avoid jealousy, suspicion, gossip, etc., and also to maintain the integrity of all parties concerned.

6- The husband's possessions are her trust. If she has access to any portion thereof, or if she is entrusted with any fund, she must discharge her duty wisely and thriftily. She may not lend or dispose of any of his belongings without his permission.

7- With respect to intimacy, the wife is to make herself desirable; to be attractive, responsive, and cooperative.

8- A wife may not deny herself to her husband, for the Qur'an speaks of them as a comfort to each other. Due consideration is, of course, given to health and decency.

9- Moreover, the wife is not permitted to do anything that may render her companionship less desirable or less gratifying. If she neglects herself, the husband has the right to interfere with her freedom to rectify the situation and insure maximum self-fulfillment for both partners. She is not permitted to do anything on his part that may impede her gratification.


Allah Almighty knows best.
____________________________________________________________________________
Source: Excerpted with some modifications from Islam in Focus by Hammudah `Abd al-`Ati’s republished in Islam online

Women Spending Own Wealth without the Husbands’ Permission.

Women spending  own wealth without their husbands’ permission.

By Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

I am a working woman, and I have a salary from which I spend on myself and my home, I give some to my family and I give some in charity, and so on. Many of the arguments that I have with my husband arise because of the way I spend my money. Does my husband have the right to object to the way I spend my money? Do I have to ask for his permission when I want to spend any of my money?

In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;

All the praise and Thanks is due to Allāh, the Lord of al-`ālameen. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam, is His Messenger

It is undoubtedly that a free adult person who is of sound mind and indulgent is permitted to dispose of his own wealth with no restrictions as long as one is alive, whether he is buying, renting, giving a gift, establishing a waqaf (endowment) or any other kind of transaction. There is no dispute among the scholars on this point.

There is also no dispute among the scholars concerning the fact that the husband does not have the right to object to the way his wife handles her wealth in transactions such as buying, renting, etc., if the woman is of sound mind and there is no reason why she should not handle her own money and she is not one of those who may be tricked. [Muraatib al-Ijmaa’ li Ibn Hazm, 162; al-Ijmaa’ fi’l-Fiqh al-Islami, Abu Habib, 2/566].

But the scholars differed as to whether a woman has the right to give all or some of her wealth in charity or as a gift without the permission of her husband. The details of their opinions are as follows:

The first opinion:

The husband has the right to prevent her from giving if the amount is more than one third of her wealth, but he does not have this right with regard to lesser amounts. This is the opinion of the Malikis and Hanbalis, and one of the two views narrated from Ahmad. [Sharh al-Khurashi, 7/103; al-Mughni, 4/513; Nayl al-Awtaar, 6/22). The evidence for this is hadiths and qiyas (analogy)].

Among the hadiths referred to are the following:

The report that Khayrah, the wife of Ka’ab ibn Malik, came to the Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam) with some jewellery of hers. The Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam) said: “It is not permissible for a woman [to dispose of] her wealth without the permission of her husband. Have you asked Ka’ab’s permission?” She said, “Yes.” So the Messenger of Allah (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam) sent for Ka’ab ibn Malik, her husband, and asked him, “Have you given permission to Khayrah to give her jewellery in charity?” He said, “Yes,” so the Messenger of Allah (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam) accepted it from her. [Reported by Ibn Majah, 2380; its isnad includes ‘Abd-Allah ibn Yahya and his father, who are majhul (not known, i.e., not enough information is known about them to ascertain whether they are trustworthy)].

The report narrated from ‘Umar ibn Shu’aib from his father from his grandfather that the Messenger of Allah (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  aid in a khutbah (sermon) he gave: “It is not permissible for a woman to give anything except with the permission of her husband.” [Sunan Abi Dawud, Buyu’, Bab 84; Sunan al-Nisa’i, Zakah, Bab 58; Musnad Ahmad, 2/179; Sunan Ibn Majah, 2/798].

According to another version: “A woman has no right to her money if she is married.” [Reported by five, except al-Tirmidzi].

These reports are taken as evidence that a woman does not have the right to spend her money except with her husband’s permission, which means that the husband’s permission is a condition any time she wants to spend; his right to stop her spending is limited to amounts over one-third of her wealth, because there are reports that indicate that the owner has the right to dispose of one-third or less of his wealth in his will, but he does not have the right to dispose of more than that without the permission of his heirs. This is seen in the famous story of Sa’ad ibn Abi Waqqas, who asked the Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  if he could give all of his wealth in charity, and he said, “No.” Sa’ad asked, “What about two-thirds?” The Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  said, “No.” Sa’ad said, “What about half?” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “No.” Sa’ad said, What about a third?” The Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  said, “[Yes,] a third, but a third is still a lot.” [Agreed upon by the Fuqaha]

With regard to their using qiyas (analogy) as evidence, they say that the husband’s rights are connected to the wife’s wealth, on the basis of the hadith: “A woman may be married for her wealth, her beauty or her religious commitment.” [Reported by the seven scholars].

Usually a husband increases his mahar because of the wife’s wealth, and he will be able to spend her money, and if he cannot afford to spend on her, she will not complain (because she has her own money). This is similar to the rights of heirs in relation to a sick person's wealth. [Al-Mughni, 4/514].

The second opinion:

The husband has the right to stop his wife from spending in all cases, whether it is a small amount or a large amount, except in the case of insignificant things. This is the opinion of al-Layth ibn Sa’d. [Nayl al-Awtaar, 6/22)]

The third opinion:

The woman is not allowed to spend anything of her wealth at all, except with the permission of her husband. This is the opinion of Tawus (Fath al-Baari, 5/218). Ibn Hajar said in al-Fath, and Tawus used as evidence, the hadith of ‘Umar ibn Shu’ayb, “It is not permissible for a woman to give anything of her own wealth except with the permission of her husband.” This was reported by Abu Dawood and al-Nisa’ie. Ibn Battaal said: “The hadeeth narrated in this chapter are more sound.”

The fourth opinion:

The woman has the right to spend her own money in all circumstances, whether in a transaction or otherwise, whether this involves all of her wealth or part of it. This is the opinion of the majority, and is the opinion of the Hanafis, Shafi’es and Hanbalis, and of Ibn al-Mundhir. [al-Mughni, 4/513; al-Ansaaf, 5/342; Ma’aani al-Athaar, 4/354; al-Baari, 5/318; al-Awtaar, 6/22].

This is the soundest opinion, and is most in accordance with the Qur’an, the Sunnah and common sense.

In the Qur’an, Allah says:

“And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahar (obligatory bridal money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) with a good heart, but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it, and enjoy it without fear of any harm (as Allah has made it lawful).”

[Al-Nisa’, 4:4]

Allah allows the husband to take what his wife gives him willingly.

Allah also says:

“And if you divorce them before you have touched (had a sexual relation with) them, and you have appointed unto them the mahar (bridal money given by the husband to the wife at the time of marriage), then pay half of that (mahar), unless the women agree to forego it…”

[al-Baqarah 2:237]

Here Allah allows women to give up as much of the mahar as they wish if their husbands divorce them, without them having to ask permission from anybody. This indicates that women have the right to decide what to do with their own money, and that a woman has rights to her wealth just as a man has rights to his wealth. [Sharh al-Ma’aani al-Athaar, 4/352].

Allah says:

“And try orphans (as regards their intelligence) until they reach the age of marriage; if then you find sound judgement in them, release their property to them…” 

[al-Nisa’, 4:6]

This clearly means that when the female orphan becomes wise and discerning, she is allowed to handle her own wealth.

Similarly, when the women gave their jewellery in charity after the Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  had addressed them during his Eid sermon, this was an indication that they are allowed to dispose of their wealth without asking permission from anybody.

[See Ittihaaf al-Khilaan bi Huquq al-Zawjayn fi’l-Islam by Dr. Fayhan ibn ‘Ateeq al-Mutayri, pp. 92-96].

It says in Nayl al-Awtaar: “the majority of scholars agreed that women are allowed [to handle their own wealth] with no restrictions and without having to ask their husbands’ permission, so long as they are not foolish, but if they are foolish, it is not permitted.” It says in al-Fath: “The majority have a lot of evidence in the Qur’an and Sunnah.”

The majority of scholars argued against those who used as evidence the hadith “It is not permissible for a woman to give anything except with the permission of her husband.” [Reported by Abu Dawud, 3079; Sahih al-Jaami’, 7265; some of its narrators have already been mentioned].

The majority of scholars said that this has to do with the good manners and proper etiquette required of the wife befitting of the rights her husband has over her, and because of his status, experience in life and wisdom. Al-Sindi said in his commentary on al-Nasa’ie with regard to the hadith quoted: “According to the majority of scholars, this has to do with good manners and proper etiquette with the husband.”

The Shafi’es argues that the hadith was not proven, so it cannot be use as evidence when the Qur’an, Sunnah, other reports and common sense indicate the opposite.

Maimunah freed a slave before the Prophet (Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam)  knew anything about it, and he did not tell her off. From this and other reports indicate that it is to be interpreted as being the matter of good manners, and the wife has the option either to ask her husband’s permission or not.

Thus the Muslim woman is encouraged to seek her husband’s permission by virtue of his rights– but it is not obligatory for her to do so – and she will be rewarded for doing that. Abu Hurayrah said: “The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was asked, ‘Which woman is the best?’ He said, ‘The one who makes [her husband] happy when he looks at her, who obeys him when he tells her to do something, and who does not oppose him in a manner he dislikes with regard to herself and her wealth.’” [Reported by al-Nisa’ie, 3179; Sahih al-Jaami’, 3292].

And Allah knows best

[Via Islam Q&A]

Husband’s Duties towards His Wife’s Family

Duties towards His Wife’s Family.

Ruling on wife going out of the house without husband’s permission and travelling without a mahram

To what degree the husband’s duties towards his wife’s family extend. I am suffering a serious problem with my husband, because he treated my mother very badly when she came to visit us (because of an argument that took place between my mother-in-law and my mother); in the end my husband virtually threw my mother out. As a result of that, I had to leave the house with my mother, against my husband’s wishes as he wanted me to stay with him. Please note that I used to live in another country and I travelled with my mother to our country. My husband treats me very well, but I got angry when he treated her in this manner. He regretted it the next day, but she will not forgive him. Was it correct, or did I fail to obey my husband as enjoined by Allah, may He be exalted and glorified?

In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;

All the praise and Thanks is due to Allāh, the Lord of al-`ālameen. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, Sallallāhu `alayhi wasallam, is His Messenger

Firstly:

The husband should uphold ties with his wife’s family and treat them well. This is part of treating his wife kindly, because doing that makes her happy and earns him respect in her eyes, and increases the love and affection between them.

Allah says:

“and live with them honourably” [Al-Nisa’, 4:19]

Ibn Kathir said:

It means speak kindly to them, treat them well and pay attention to your deeds and your appearance as much as you can; as you would like her to do for you, do the same for her. Allah says:

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [Al-Baqarah, 2:228]

The Messenger of Allah s.a.w said: “The best of you is the one who is best towards his family; and I am the best of you towards my family.” Classified as sahih by al-Albani in al-Silsilah al-Sahihah, 285. [Tafsir Ibn Kathir, 1/477]

Secondly:

With regard to your husband throwing your mother out of his house, and he has apologized for it, the apology should be accepted and his mistake should be forgiven and the case closed.

The married woman should remember that obedience to her husband takes precedence over obedience to her parents. A man should not give precedence to anyone over his mother with regard to kind treatment, and a woman should not give precedence to anyone over her husband with regard to obedience. That is because of the greatness of the rights that he has over her. Part of the greatness of men’s rights over women is that syari’ah almost commanded women to prostrate to men, were it not for the fact that it is not permissible for anyone to prostrate to any human being.

The husband has no right to prevent his wife’s family from visiting their daughter, unless he fears that they may cause some mischief to her or encourage her to be willfully defiant towards him (nushuz). In that case, he may prevent visits.

Thirdly:

You made two mistakes and went against syari’ah by doing them. The first mistake was going out of the house without your husband’s permission, and the second was travelling without a mahram.

Going out of the house without the husband’s permission is a haram action; Allah has even forbidden women who are revocably divorced (first or second Talaq) from going out of their houses, so how about women who are not in that position? Allah says :

“O Prophet! When you divorce women, divorce them at their ‘Iddah (prescribed periods) and count (accurately) their ‘Iddah (periods). And fear Allah your Lord (O Muslims). And turn them not out of their (husband’s) homes nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of some open illegal sexual intercourse. And those are the set limits of Allah. And whosoever transgresses the set limits of Allah, then indeed he has wronged himself”

[Al-Talaq, 65:1]

Sheikh al-Islam Ibn Taimiyah said:

Zaid ibn Thabit said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allah, and he recited the verse in which Allah says :

“They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yusuf, 12:25]

‘Umar ibn al-Khattab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidzi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”

So a woman is like a slave or prisoner of her husband, and she cannot go out of his house except with his permission, whether her father, her mother or anyone else tells her to do that, according to the consensus of the imams. [Al-Fatawa al-Kubra, 3/148 ]

Ibn Muflih al-Hanbali said:

It is haram for a woman to go out of her husband’s house without his permission, except in cases of necessity, or shar’ie obligations. [Al-Adaab al-Shar’iyyah, 3/375 ]

With regard to a woman travelling without a mahram, this is haram. This is stated in sahih ahadith from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him).

Al-Nawawi said:

Everything that is called travelling, it is forbidden for a woman to do without her husband or a mahram, whether it is three days, two days or one day, or bareed (a distance equivalent to approximately twenty kilometers) or anything else, because of the hadith of Ibn ‘Abbas, according to which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “No woman should travel without a mahram.” This includes everything that is called travel. And Allah knows best. [Sharh Muslim, 9/103 ]

Please see also the rights of both husband and wife.

And Allah knows best.

[Via Islam Q&A]

Please See Also:

 1.The Meaning of Silatul Rahim; 2.Guidelines on Ties of the Kinship;

3.The Obligation of Upholding the Ties of Kinship;4.The Rights of the Kin in Islam;

5The Rights and Duties of Women in Islam.; 6.All Occurs By The Will And Decree Of Allāh;

7.Allah Obligates Kindness to Parents; 8.Acknowledging the Parents;

9.The Kindred of Kinship;

10. Not Permissible To Forsake A Muslim;

11.Ruling On Disputes and the Virtue of Reconciling;

12.Dealing With Relatives Who Backbite;13. Dealing with Hurtful Relatives;

14.Giving Zakah to Deserving Relatives;15.Is the Father’s Wife among the Relatives (Rahm);

16.Husband’s Duties towards His Wife’s Family ; 17.The Rights of the Husband and the Wife;

18.Upholding the Ties of Kinship for Females;19.A Woman’s Mahram;

20.The Seven under the Shade of Allāh

The Rights of the Husband and the Wife.

The Rights of the Husband and the Wife.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

What are a wife's rights on her husband according the Quran and Sunnah? Or what are husband’s duties to his wife and vice versa?

Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;

All the praise and Thanks are due to Allāh, the Lord of  al-'ālameen. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam, is His Messenger.

Islām has enjoined upon the husband duties towards his wife, and vice versa, and among these duties are some which are shared by both husband and wife.

By the help of Allāh we will mention some of the texts of the Qur’an and Sunnah which have to do with the duties of the spouses towards one another, quoting also from the commentaries and views of the scholars.

Firstly: The rights of the wife which are hers alone: 

The wife has financial rights over her husband, which is the mahar (dowry), spending and accommodation. And she has non-financial rights, such as fair division between co-wives, being treated in a decent and reasonable manner, and not being treated in a harmful way by her husband.

1. Financial Rights

(a) The mahar (dowry). This is the money to which the wife is entitled from her husband when the marriage contract is completed or when the marriage is consummated. It is a right which the man is obliged to pay to the woman.

Allāh says:

“And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahar (obligatory bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) with a good heart” 

[al-Nisa’, 4:4]

The prescription of the mahar demonstrates the seriousness and importance of the marriage-contract, and is a token of respect and honour to the woman.

The mahar is not a condition or essential part of the marriage-contract, according to the majority of fuqaha’; rather it is one of the consequences of the contract. If the marriage-contract is done without any mention of the mahar, it is still valid, according to the consensus of the majority.

Allāh says:

“There is no sin on you, if you divorce women while yet you have not touched (had sexual relation with) them, nor appointed unto them their Mahar (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage)” 

[Al-Baqarah, 2:236]

The fact that divorce is permitted before consummation of the marriage or before stipulating the mahar indicates that it is permissible not to stipulate the mahar in the marriage-contract.

If the mahar is stipulated, it becomes obligatory upon the husband; if it is not stipulated, then he must give the mahar that is given to women of similar status to his wife.

(b) Spending. The scholars of Islam are agreed that it is obligatory for husbands to spend on their wives, on the condition that the wife makes herself available to her husband. If she refuses him or rebels, then she is not entitled to that spending.

The reason why it is obligatory to spend on her is that the woman is available only to her husband, because of the marriage contract, and she is not allowed to leave the marital home except with his permission. So he has to spend on her and provide for her, and this is in return for her making herself available to him for his pleasure.

What is meant by spending is providing what the wife needs of food and accommodation. She has the right to these things even if she is rich, because Allāh says:

“but the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis” [Al-Baqarah, 2:233]

“Let the rich man spend according to his means; and the man whose resources are restricted, let him spend according to what Allāh has given him” [Al-Talaq, 65:7]

From the Sunnah:

The Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said to Hind bint ‘Utbah – the wife of Abu Sufyan – who had complained that he did not spend on her: “Take what is sufficient for you and your children, on a reasonable basis.”

It was narrated that ‘Aishah said: “Hind binti ‘Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyan, entered upon the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allāh, Abu Sufyan is a stingy man who does not spend enough on me and my children, except for what I take from his wealth without his knowledge. Is there any sin on me for doing that?’ The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said, ‘Take from his wealth on a reasonable basis, only what is sufficient for you and your children.’” [Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 5049; Muslim, 1714]

It was narrated from Jabir that the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said in his Farewell Sermon:

“Fear Allāh concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allāh, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allāh. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” 

[Narrated by Muslim, 1218]

(c) Accommodation. This is also one of the wife’s rights, which means that her husband should prepare for her accommodation according to his means and ability. 

Allāh says:

“Lodge them (the divorced women) where you dwell, according to your mean” 

[Al –Talaq, 65:6]

2. Non-financial rights 

(i) Fair treatment of co-wives. One of the rights that a wife has over her husband is that she and her co-wives should be treated equally, if the husband has other wives, with regard to nights spent with them, spending and clothing.

(ii) Kind treatment. The husband must have a good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything that may soften her heart towards him, because Allāh says:

“and live with them honorably” [Al-Nisa,’ 4:19]

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [Al-Baqarah, 2:228]

From the Sunnah:

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allāh be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said: ‘Be kind to women.’”[Narrated by al-Bukhari, 3153; Muslim, 1468].

There follow examples of the kind treatment of the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) towards his wives – for he is the best example:

1. It was narrated from Zainab binti Abi Salamah that Umm Salamah said: “I got my menses when I was lying with the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) under a single woollen sheet. I slipped away and put on the clothes I usually wore for menstruation. The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said to me, ‘Have you got your menses?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ Then he called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet.”

She said: And she told me that the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam)  used to kiss her when he was fasting, and the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) and I used to do ghusl to cleanse ourselves from janabah from one vessel. 

[Narrated by al-Bukhari, 316; Muslim, 296]

2. It was narrated that ‘Urwah ibn al-Zubair said: “ ‘Aishah said: ‘By Allāh, I saw the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) standing at the door of my apartment when the Abyssinians were playing with their spears in the Mosque of the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam). He covered me with his cloak so that I could watch their games, then he stood there for my sake until I was the one who had had enough. So you should appreciate the fact that young girls like to have fun.’” 

[Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 443; Muslim, 892]

3. It was narrated from ‘Aishah the Mother of the Believers (may Allāh be pleased with her) that the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) used to pray sitting down; he would recite Qur’an when he was sitting down, then when there were thirty or forty ayats left, he would stand up and recite them standing up. Then he did ruku’, then sujud; then he would do likewise in the second rak’ah. When he had finished his prayer, he would look, and if I was awake he would talk with me, and if I was asleep he would lie down. [Narrated by al-Bukhari, 1068]

(c) Not harming one’s wife.

This is one of the basic principles of Islam. Because harming others is haram in the case of strangers, it is even more so in the case of harming one’s wife.

It was narrated from ‘Ubadah ibn al-Samit that the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) ruled: “There should be neither harming nor reciprocating harm.” [Narrated by Ibn Majah, 2340]

This hadith was classified as sahih by Imam Ahmad, al-Hakim, Ibn al-Salah and others. See Khalasat al-Badr al-Muneer, 2/438.

Among the things to which the Lawgiver drew attention in this matter is the prohibition of hitting or beating in a severe manner.

It was narrated from Jabir that the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said in his Farewell Sermon:

“Fear Allāh concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allāh, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allāh. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” 

[Narrated by Muslim, 1218]

Secondly: The husband’s rights over his wife.

The rights of the husband over his wife are among the greatest rights; indeed his rights over her are greater than her rights over him, because Allāh says:

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them 

[Al-Baqarah, 2:228]

Al-Jassas said: Allāh tells us in this ayah that each of the spouses has rights over the other and that the husband has one particular right over his wife which she does not have over him.

Ibn al-‘Arabi said: this text states that he has some preference over her with regard to rights and duties of marriage.

These rights include:

(a) the obligation of obedience. Allāh has made the man a qawwaam (protector and maintainer) of the woman by commanding, directing and taking care of her, just as guardians take care of their charges, by virtue of the physical and mental faculties that Allāh has given only to men and the financial obligations that He has enjoined upon them. 

Allāh says:

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allāh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means” 

[Al-Nisa’, 4:34]

‘Ali ibn Abi Talhah said, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women” means, they are in charge of them, i.e., she should obey him in matters of obedience that Allāh has enjoined upon her, and obey him by treating his family well and taking care of his wealth. This was the view of Muqaatil, al-Saddi and al-Dahhaak. [Tafsir Ibn Kathir, 1/492]

(b) Making herself available to her husband. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that he should be able to enjoy her (physically). If he marries a woman and she is able to have intercourse, she is obliged to submit herself to him according to the contract, if he asks her. That is after he gives her the immediate mahar, and gives her some time – two or three days, if she asks for that – to sort herself out, because that is something that she needs, and because that is not too long and is customary.

If a wife refuses to respond to her husband’s request for intercourse, she has done something haraam and has committed a major sin, unless she has a valid sharī’e excuse such as menses, obligatory fasting, sickness, etc.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allāh be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said: ‘When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he went to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.’” [Narrated by al-Bukhari, 3065; Muslim, 1436]

(c) Not admitting anyone whom the husband dislikes. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that she should not permit anyone whom he dislikes to enter his house.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allāh be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said: “It is not permitted for a woman to fast when her husband is present without his permission, or to admit anyone into his house without his permission. And whatever she spends (in charity) of his wealth without his consent,” [Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 4899; Muslim, 1026]

It was narrated from Suleiman ibn ‘Amr ibn al-Ahwaz: my father told me that he was present at the Farewell Pilgrimage (Hajjat al-Wada’) with the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam). He [the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam)] praised and glorified Allāh, then he preached a sermon and said: “Treat women kindly, for they are prisoners and you have no other power over them than that, if they are guilty of open lewdness, then refuse to share their beds, and hit them, but not severely. But if they return to obedience, (then) do not seek means (of annoyance) against them. You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house. Their rights over you are that you should feed and clothe them well.”
[Narrated by Al-Tirmidzi, 1163 – he said this is a sahih hasan hadith. Also narrated by Ibn Majah, 1851]

It was narrated that Jabir said: [the Prophet] (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said: “Fear Allāh concerning women ! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allāh, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allāh. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” [Narrated by Muslim, 1218]

(d) Not going out of the house except with the husband’s permission. One of the rights of the husband over his wife is that she should not go out of the house except with his permission.

The Shafi’es and Hanbalis said: she does not have the right to visit (even) her sick father except with the permission of her husband, and he has the right to prevent her from doing that… because obedience to the husband is obligatory, and it is not permitted to neglect an obligatory action for something that is not obligatory.

(e) Discipline. The husband has the right to discipline his wife if she disobeys him in something good, not if she disobeys him in something sinful, because Allāh has enjoined disciplining women by forsaking them in bed and by hitting them, when they do not obey.

The Hanafis mentioned four situations in which a husband is permitted to discipline his wife by hitting her. These are: not adorning herself when he wants her to; not responding when he calls her to bed and she is tahirah (pure, i.e., not menstruating); not praying; and going out of the house without his permission.

The evidence that it is permissible to discipline one's wife includes the ayats:

“As to those women on whose part you see ill conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful)” [Al-Nisa’, 4:34]

“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones” [Al-Tahrim, 66:6]

Ibn Kathir said: Qatadah said: you should command them to obey Allāh, and forbid them to disobey Allāh; you should be in charge of them in accordance with the command of Allāh, and instruct them to follow the commands of Allāh, and help them to do so. If you see any act of disobedience towards Allāh, then stop them from doing it and rebuke them for that.

This was also the view of al-Dahhaak and Muqaatil: that the duty of the Muslim is to teach his family, including his relatives and his slaves, that which Allāh has enjoined upon them and that which He has forbidden them. [Tafsir Ibn Kathir, 4/392]

(f) The wife serving her husband. There is a great deal of evidence (dalil) for this, some of which has been mentioned above.

(g) Submitting herself to him. Once the conditions of the marriage-contract have been fulfilled and it is valid, then the woman is obliged to submit herself to her husband and allow him to enjoy her (physically), because once the contract is completed, he is allowed in return to enjoy her, and the wife is entitled to the compensation which is the mahar.

(h) The wife should treat her husband in a good manner.

Allāh says:

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” 

[Al-Baqarah 2:228]

Al-Qurtubi said: It was also narrated from him – i.e., Ibn ‘Abbas – that this means: they have the right to good companionship and kind and reasonable treatment from their husbands just as they are obliged to obey the commands of their husbands.

And it was said that they have the right that their husbands should not harm them, and their husbands have a similar right over them. This was the view of al-Tabari. Ibn Zaid said: You should fear Allāh concerning them just as they should fear Allāh concerning you. The meanings are similar, and the ayah includes all of that in the rights and duties of marriage. [Tafsir al-Qurtubi, 3/123-124]

And Allāh knows best.

[ Via Islam Q&A]

Please See Also:

 1.The Meaning of Silatul Rahim; 2.Guidelines on Ties of the Kinship;

3.The Obligation of Upholding the Ties of Kinship; 4.The Rights of the Kin in Islam;

5.The Rights and Duties of Women in Islam.; 6.All Occurs By The Will And Decree Of Allāh;

7.Allah Obligates Kindness to Parents; 8.Acknowledging the Parents;

9.The Kindred of Kinship;

10. Not Permissible To Forsake A Muslim;

11.Ruling On Disputes and the Virtue of Reconciling;

12.Dealing With Relatives Who Backbite;13. Dealing with Hurtful Relatives;

14.Giving Zakah to Deserving Relatives;15.Is the Father’s Wife among the Relatives (Rahm);

16.Husband’s Duties towards His Wife’s Family ; 17.The Rights of the Husband and the Wife;

18.Upholding the Ties of Kinship for Females;19.A Woman’s Mahram;

20.The Seven under the Shade of Allāh