Sunday, February 28, 2010

He Wants Me to Neglect My Parents!

He Wants Me to Neglect My Parents!

 Question: What are the obligations of a wife's towards her family? If, say, a husband says she can't see her family, is he wrong? How far should she obey him? I know it's meant to be a son's obligation to take care of parents, but what if your brother is too young, or you don't have a brother? It becomes the daughter’s responsibility, then, right? [Laila – Norway]


In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;
All the praise and Thanks are due to Allāh, the Lord of the al-ā’lamīn. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam, is His Messenger.


As salamu ‘alaykum Dear sister.

Maintenance of family ties.

In Islām, marriage is not about two individuals joining together; it is about two families joining together. Whether one is a convert to Islām, or a born Muslim, the rights of the parents, whether the parents are Muslims or not remain the same. Islam stresses very much the maintenance of family ties, because through the maintenance of family ties we learn of compassion, forgiveness, understanding, sacrifice and unconditional love (love for the sake of Allāh), because Islam is very much a social religion.

However, we are human, and we are subject to weaknesses, some of which is heavily influenced by the social environ in which we have been raised and, or live in. If one is used to a secular life, whether one is Muslim or not, there is a greater sense of individualism, privacy and ownership with these factors shaping the nature of marital life. In the secular world, one is more likely to leave behind ones parents to begin life anew in marriage; however Allāh subhānahu wata’ala tells is as follows:

“And We have enjoined man in respect of his parents – his mother bears him with fainting upon fainting and his weaning takes two years – saying: Be grateful to Me and to both your parents; to Me is the eventual coming”

[Al-Luqman, 31: 14].

There is no age limit on this guidance, so as you were in childhood grateful to your parents, so should you are in adulthood. If one ceases all communication with ones parents how can one show gratefulness?

“And your Lord has commanded that you should not serve (any) but Him, and goodness to your parents. If either or both of them should reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) “Ugh” nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word”

[Al-Isrā’, 17: 23]

Then we are strongly advised:

Allah's Apostle (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) said, "Allah will not be merciful to those who are not merciful to mankind."

 [Al Bukhāri 9: 93 No: 473]

This includes all mankind, including one’s parents!

When a man asked of Prophet Muhammed (Sallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) of the best deeds to perform, one of three deeds explained was to “…be good and dutiful to one's own parents…” [Al Bukhari 9: 93 No: 625]

The only times we are disobedient to our parents are if they ask of us to disobey Allah subhānahu wata’ala’s guidance.

“… and if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them…”

[Al-Ankabut, 29: 8]

If your husband has grievance against your parents on these grounds, then you need to moderate how much time you spend with your mother. However, if there is no one else who can take care of them, then mercy should be shown. Make regular duā’ (supplication) that your husband will increase in understanding of your need to take care of your parents, and speak with him in a gentle manner to ascertain his reasons and to explain your need (by his permission).

Wallahu’alam

Saturday, February 27, 2010

The Husband’s Rights over Wife.

The husband’s rights over his wife are greater

The mother’s rights over her daughter are great; but the husband’s rights over his wife are greater.

I have two situations that which I would like to ask. My mother is very demanding and fights with me all the time about my husband who has been very good to me and my children and her. She wants him to take her traveling and other things that involve spending a lot of time with her and he does not wish to do due to his demanding job as a doctor and because he feels that they will not get along. She visits our home at least 4-5 months every year and makes me take her out on a daily basis not even worrying that it makes me neglect my home and children. She is also very busy trying to make her own businesses so she fought with me about taking my brother or sister to live with me (they are 16 and 18) and tells me it is my right and I don’t need to even have my husband’s permission on the matter. She also refuses to pay a loan that her and my father (who passed away 2 years ago) made me take when I was in college attending a university I didn’t even want to attend when I was 16 years old, this loan has destroyed my name making it impossible for me to buy anything with my name. She has done this to many people she owes money. On top of this, before my father passed away, he had written all properties and money in her name to make it easier to disperse to each of us (we are four girls and one boy) rather than involving an outside party; after he died, she said it is all in her name, and that she paid for a lot of his businesses before they succeeded so she will keep all the money as her own until she dies. I even gave her about $100,000 (all the money I have ever saved and worked for) because she pretended that she was going to use it to pay off my dad’s debts and she used it for a summer house instead and denies I ever gave her a penny since I never told anyone else because I wanted it between me, my mom and Allah swt even though I know she has a lot of money of her own. My husband was tired of this (and many more bad situations) and so he confronted her about the least of these problems – the old school loan, which was taken over 6 years before we were even married and keeps on multiplying in debt and on my name. He then continued to confront her about the many wrong things that have happened and involved his family too. She got very angry and didn’t want to speak to either of us. Naturally, I wanted to fulfill my obligations to my mother so I managed to get on good speaking terms with her so I do not defy silāt al rahim. We speak fine most of the time but after a couple weeks of that she will go back to insulting my husband, telling me to defy him and disobey him in order for him to apologize to her, and insulting me and my husband with very hurtful and shameful words. This relationship is badly affecting my marriage and my time at home and with my children. I cannot think about anything else and my husband doesn’t want to apologize because he is right and feels my mom has not changed her bad ways and will not even pay off the old loan. And at the same time it is extremely difficult to communicate with her on a healthy level. We live in two different countries (me in America and her in Egypt) and she says if I love her and don’t want to upset Allah swt that I will bring my three kids and visit her, my husband does not want me to leave him and she knows this and insists that I am being a bad muslim and that Allah swt will punish me for disobeying my mother. I have tried to advise her to fear Allah swt and she gets mad and says I should obey her and be against my husband. My husband tells me to try to keep good ties with her as much as I can, and is a very good husband and father otherwise, Alhamdulillah, we have a very happy marriage and three healthy children. And so my questions are: 1. what are my obligations to my mother in such an ugly situation, keeping in mind that she continues to insult my husband in our phone calls (we live in two different countries) and asks me to disobey and defy him and cause problems in order for him to apologize to her. This communication has left me emotionally drained, it is what I think about most of my days and it wastes so much of time that I can use with studying or caring for my home. What is the minimum in regards to visiting and speaking to her so that Allah swt will not be angry with me and at the same time I will fulfill my obligation to her and not have to worry about her saying that Allah swt is upset? 2. Who is responsible for this loan? Keeping in mind that I was forced to attend this university, told to take a loan by mother and father, was only 16-18 years old and my husband was not told about this loan before marriage. Also, my mother has more than enough money to pay it off. Your help is deeply appreciated and greatly needed as soon as possible.

In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;
All the praise and Thanks are due to Allāh, the Lord of the al-ā’lamīn. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam, is His Messenger.

1. The mother’s status cannot be denied.


The mother’s status in shari’ah cannot be denied. Allāh has enjoined that her children should honour her, and He has forbidden them to disobey her; He has ruled that the mother is the most entitled of people to one’s good company, as it says in the well-known hadith, when a man said: O Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam), which of the people is most deserving of my good companionship? He said: “Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then the next closest and the next closest.” [Narrated by Muslim (2548)]


This is the mother’s right, and that is her status. It is not permissible for her to consume her children’s wealth unlawfully; rather she must give each one his or her rights, and divide the estate in accordance with the laws of Allāh. It is also not permissible for the mother to incite her daughter against her husband and spoil the good relationship between them. These actions of this mother are evil deeds which are not acceptable in Islam, and they bring the threat of sin and punishment.


Perhaps the greatest way in which you can honour your mother is by deterring her from consuming haram wealth and doing haram things, and stopping her from wronging people unlawfully, and remind her of the sin involved in spoiling the relationship between husband and wife, and the sin of gheebah (backbiting), reviling and insulting others, and other haram things that she is doing, such as tabarruj (wanton display) and travelling without a mahram, if these are true in her case.

With regard to your siblings who want your mother to live with you and your husband, you are not obliged to do that according to shari’ah, rather it is the duty of your mother, and in this case the right belongs to your husband: if he agrees to that, all well and good, otherwise you are not obliged to do this, rather we do not advise your husband to accept this situation, because they are not neglected or in need of such a thing, they are not poor and in need of someone to spend on them, and your mother is not unable to take care of their affairs. Taking this responsibility from her is helping her to do the things that she is doing that go against Islam, and to neglect her duties, and pass on this burden to your husband, and put pressure on you and your household with something that is not required of you in the first place, let alone the unacceptable things that may result from your sister living in the same house as a man who is not her mahram (your husband). We do not advise you to accept this situation under any circumstances.

2. But the mother’s right does not supersede the rights of the husband.

The status and rights of the mother do not supersede the rights of the husband; rather the husband’s rights are greater and take precedence over your mother’s rights. Your obedience to him takes precedence over your obedience to her, and the wise wife strives to please her husband by doing what he wants so long as it is not contrary to shari’ah, and she strives to honour her mother in ways that do not go against her husband’s commands. If there is a conflict of interest, then she should put her husband’s commands and wishes first.

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allāh have mercy on him) was asked about a woman who got married, and was no longer under her parents’ care; which one is better – honouring her parents or obeying her husband?

Ibn Taymiyyah replied:
When a woman gets married, her husband has more authority over her than her parents, and obeying her husband is more obligatory for her.

Allāh (Subhānahu wata’ala) says: “Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allāh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allāh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity and their husband’s property)” [An-Nisa’ 4:34].

The Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said: “
This world is temporary conveniences and the best of its comforts is a believing wife, who when you look at her she pleases you and if you tell her to do something she obeys you, and if you are away from her she protects you with regard to herself and your wealth.”

Abu Hurayrah (radiallāhu`anhu) said: The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“If a woman offers her five (daily prayers) and fasts her month and guards her chastity and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from whichever of its gates she wants.” [Abu Hatim].

Umm Salamah (radiallāhu`anha) said: The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“Any woman, who dies when her husband is pleased with her, will enter Paradise.” [Al-Tirmidzi: classified it is a hasan]

Abu Hurayrah (radiallāhu`anhu)  narrated that the Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“If I were to order anyone to prostrate to anyone, I would have ordered women to prostrate to their husbands.” [Al-Tirmidzi: classified it is a hasan]. It was also narrated with the wording: “I would have ordered women to prostrate to their husbands because of the rights that Allāh has given them over them.” [Abu Dawud].

In al-Musnad it is narrated from Anas (radiallāhu`anhu) that the Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“It is not acceptable for any human to prostrate to another, but if it were acceptable for any human to prostrate to another, I would have ordered women to prostrate to their husbands, because of the greatness of the rights they have over them. By the One in Whose hand is my soul, if there were sores from his feet to the top of his head flowing with pus, then she licked them, she would not have given him all his rights.”

The Virtue of Obeying the Husband.

There are many ahadith on this topic from the Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam).

Zaid ibn Thabit (radiallāhu`anhu) said:
“The husband is a sayyid (master) in the Book of Allāh”. Then he quoted the verse: “They both found her lord (i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yusuf 12:25].

‘Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (radiallāhu`anhu) said:
“Marriage is like slavery, so let one of you look to whom he is giving his beloved daughter to be a slave to”. In al-Tirmidzi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are like prisoners with you.”

So the woman is like a slave of her husband, or like a prisoner; she should not go out of his house without his permission, whether she is told to do so by her father, her mother or anyone else, according to scholarly consensus.

If a man wants to take her to another place, so long as he is doing what is required of him, and observing the sacred limits of Allāh with regard to her, and her father tells her not to obey him in that, then she must obey her husband and not her father, because in that case the parents are wrongdoers, and they have no right to tell her not to obey someone like this husband, and she does not have the right to obey her mother if she tells her to leave him or to cause trouble to him so that he will divorce her, such as demanding more maintenance and more clothing, and demanding (the deferred portion of) her mahr so that he may divorce her. It is not permissible for her to obey either of her parents by divorcing him if he fears Allāh with regard to her.

In the four Sunans and Sahih Ibn Abi Hatim it is narrated that Thawban (radiallāhu`anhu) said: The Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“Any woman who asks her husband for a divorce when there is nothing wrong, the fragrance of Paradise will be forbidden to her.” According to another hadith: “The women who ask for khula’ and the women who make a wanton display of themselves are indeed hypocrites.”

But if both or one of her parents tells her to do something that involves obedience to Allāh, such as praying regularly, speaking the truth and fulfilling trusts, and tells her not to squander or waste her money, and other things that have been enjoined or forbidden by Allāh and His Messenger, then she must obey them in that, even if the command comes from someone other than her parents, more so if it comes from her parents.

If her husband tells her not to do something that is enjoined by Allāh, and he tells her to do something that Allāh has forbidden, and then she should not obey him. The Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator.” If a master orders his slave to do something that involves disobedience towards Allāh, it is not permissible for him to obey him by disobeying Him, so how can a woman obey her husband or one of her parents by committing sin? All goodness is in obeying Allāh and His Messenger, and all evil is in disobeying Allāh and His Messenger. [Majmu’ al-Fatāwa (32/261-264).]

This is sufficient to explain that it is not permissible for your mother to spoil the relationship between you and your husband, and it is not permissible for you to obey her in that, and your husband’s right to your obedience is greater than your mother’s.

3. You Are Not Obliged To Take Care Of Any Of Your Siblings.

Just as you are not obliged to take care of any of your siblings because of your commitment of your husband and the requirement that he should first agree to that, the same applies to your visiting your mother with your children. This is not permissible except with the consent of your husband, and you have done well to refuse your mother’s request. We affirm that this refusal is islamically acceptable, especially since you have no mahram to travel with you.

With regard to limiting the number of your mother’s visits to you, this is something that is also up to your husband, and you can work it out with him. The husband has the right to prevent anyone who he thinks is a trouble-maker from entering his house, even if they are your family. As you are in agreement and you have a good relationship, then the matter is simple. All you have to do is agree on a specific number and time for her visits, and stipulate that to her. Your husband has every right to do this; indeed we think that if he stops her altogether he will be doing the right thing, but there is the hope that if her visits are restricted to only a few, and do not affect your family’s happiness, then there is no reason why they should be prevented, and there is nothing wrong with tolerating them. Determining the limit is up to you and you should consult one another and come to some agreement.

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Salih al-‘Uthaymeen (rahimullāh) said: “And not allow into your houses anyone whom you dislike” means, they (wives) should not allow anyone to enter the house if your (the husband) do not want him or her to enter, even if it is her mother or her father. It is not permissible for her to let her mother, father, sister, brother, paternal uncle, maternal uncle, paternal aunt or maternal aunt into her husband’s house, if he objects to that. Attention is drawn to this because some women – Allāh forbid – are bad even to their daughters. If they see that the daughters are settled and happy with their husbands, they become jealous – Allāh forbid – even though they are mothers, and they try to spoil things between the daughter and her husband. So the husband has the right to stop such a mother from entering his house, and he has the right to say to his wife: She should not enter my house. He has the right to prevent her according to shari’ah, and he has the right to prevent his wife from going to see her, because she is namāmah (one who spreads malicious gossip) and a troublemaker. The Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said:
“No spreader of malicious gossip will enter Paradise.” [Sharh Riyadh al-Saaliheen (2/91, hadith no. 276)]

4. Avoid Riba.

It seems that the sin of the riba-based loan that is mentioned in your question is borne by you, because you were an adult and responsible for your dealings. So try to get back what is rightfully yours from your mother, and stop the mounting interest payments that result from your delay in repaying it. Try not to pay back anything but the original amount without the interest (riba). If you are not able to do that, then there is no blame on you, but it is essential to repent sincerely, because riba is a major sin.

And Allāh knows best.

[Excerpted from Fatwa no Fatwa No: 110845 Islam Q&A]

Obeying Husband or Parents?

What Comes First: Obeying My Husband or My Parents?

Question: I would like to know, after marriage, should one obey one's husband in opposition to the father, or vice versa? That is, if my husband wants me to do something different from what my father or mother want, should I obey him or my parents? Jazakumullah khairan.

Answer: By IOL Shari`ah Researchers


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
All the praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

We would like first to state that we should be dutiful to our parents and obey them as long as they do not command us to do anything Haram.

Dutifulness to parents is one of the obligations highly stressed upon in Islam. That’s why it’s oft-repeated in the Qur’an, and in most cases, it’s mentioned alongside the duty of worshipping Allah, the Almighty. This makes it clear that both dutifulness to parents and worshipping Allah are inseparable duties that Muslim must give his utmost attention.

But the point that we must not overlook is the impact of marriage on both man’s and woman’s spheres of affection, loyalty and obedience. Perhaps this weighs much more on woman due to the nature of her role in marital life. Addressing this point, Muslim jurists maintain that the bond of marriage makes it imperative on a woman to strike a balance between her dutifulness towards her parents and her love and loyalty to her husband. But if there arises any conflict between this and that (i.e. upon receiving conflicting orders from both her parents and her husband, assuming that both orders are aiming at good) then priority should be given to the command of the husband.

This point is further clarified by Sheikh M. S. Al-Munajjid, a prominent Saudi Muslim lecturer and author, in the following fatwa:

“The responsibilities of a married woman towards her parents are like those of any other woman. The rights a woman owes her parents remain intact and sacred, both before and after marriage. But obedience to the husband takes precedence over obedience to the parents if there is a conflict.

Having said this, the Muslim couple must strive to avoid the occurrence of such conflict. They should do their best to let the atmosphere of love and harmony prevails in their relations with their in-laws.”

[Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: www.islam-qa.com]

Maintaining the stability of the new family which mainly consists of the husband and wife is the main reason behind this ruling. The spouses, while striving to show due respect to their parents, should not allow them to cause any disruption to their marital life by forcing them to do anything that may negatively affect their family.

Shedding more light on this point, the late prominent Muslim scholar, Dr. Ahmad Ash-Sharbasi, Professor of `Aqeedah and Philosophy at Al-Azhar University, states:

“As long as the girl is in her father's house, the father is her guardian and she has to obey his commands and follow his directions. However, once she gets married, then the responsibility over her moves to her husband. Now, she has become a pillar of a new family and therefore obedience to the husband is given high priority.

Muslim scholars’ view that a Muslim wife should obey her husband in all what he commands as long as it is not Haram. If the parents interfere in this in a way that may shake the stability of the marital life, such interference should not be allowed. Thus, it’s very important for married couples to establish mutual understanding between them in a way that will secure peace and harmony in their relationship.”

Allah Almighty knows best.

[Excerpted from Islam Online: Question and Answer Details, Sep 14, 2002]

The Mutual Rights of Husband and Wife.


In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

In Islam the marriage of a man and a woman is not just a financial and physical arrangement of living together but a sacred contract, a gift of Allah, to lead a happy, enjoyable life and continue the lineage. The main goal of marriage in Islam is the realization of tranquility and compassions between the spouses. For the attainment of this supreme goal, Islam defined certain duties and rights for the husband and wife.

Piety is the basis of choosing the life partner. Many are the statements of the Qur'an and the Sunnah that prescribe kindness and equity, compassion and love, sympathy and consideration, patience and good will. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, says, "The best Muslim is the one who is best to his family." Also, he says, "… and the most blessed joy in life is a good, righteous wife." [Reported by At-Tirmidzi]

The role of the husband revolves around the moral principle that it is his solemn duty to Allah to treat his wife with kindness, honor, and patience; to keep her honorably or free her from the marital bond honorably; and to cause her no harm or grief. Allah Almighty says: "…consort with them in kindness, for if ye hate them it may happen that ye hate a thing wherein Allah hath placed much good." [An-Nisa', 4: 19]

The role of the wife is summarized in the verse that women have rights even as they have duties, according to what is equitable; but men have a degree over them. Allah Almighty says, "And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them in kindness, and men are a degree above them. Allah is Mighty, Wise." [Al-Baqarah, 2: 228]

This degree is usually interpreted by Muslim scholars in conjunction with another passage which states, among other things, that men are trustees, guardians, and protectors of women because Allah has made some of them excel others and because men expend of their means. Allah Almighty says: "Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath men the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High Exalted, Great." [An-Nisa', 4: 34]

A-The Wife's Rights; The Husband's Obligations:

The Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet s.a.w, have commanded kindness to women, it is the husband's duty to:

1- Consort with his wife in an equitable and kind manner. Allah Almighty says, "… and consort with them in kindness." [An-Nisa', 4: 19]

2- Have responsibility for the full maintenance of the wife, a duty which he must discharge cheerfully, without reproach, injury, or condescendence. Allah Almighty says: "Let him who hath abundance spend of his abundance, and he whose provision is measured, let him spend of that which Allah hath given him. Allah asketh naught of any soul save that which He hath given it. Allah will vouchsafe, after hardship, ease.‏" [At-Talaq, 65: 7]

Components of Maintenance:

Maintenance entails the wife's incontestable right to lodging, clothing, nourishing, and general care and well-being.

1-The wife's residence must be adequate so as to provide her with the reasonable level of privacy, comfort, and independence. The welfare of the wife and the stability of the marriage should be the ultimate goal.

2-What is true of the residence is true of clothing, food, and general care. The wife has the right to be clothed, fed, and cared for by the husband, in accordance with his means and her style of life. These rights are to be exercised without extravagance or miserliness.

Non-Material Rights:

A husband is commanded by the law of Allah to:

1- Treat his wife with equity.

2- Respect her feelings, and to show her kindness and consideration.

3- Not to show his wife any aversion or to subject her to suspense or uncertainty.

4- Not to keep his wife with the intention of inflicting harm on her or hindering her freedom.

5- Let her demand freedom from the marital bond, if he has no love or sympathy for her.

B. The Wife's Obligations; The Husband's Rights:

The main obligation of the wife as a partner in a marital relationship is to contribute to the success and blissfulness of the marriage as much as possible. She must be attentive to the comfort and well-being of her mate. She may neither offend him nor hurt his feelings. Perhaps nothing can illustrate the point better than the Qur'anic statement which describes the righteous people as those who pray saying: "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the joy and the comfort of our eyes, and guide us to be models of righteousness.” [Al-Furqan, 25: 74]

This is the basis on which all the wife's obligations rest and from which they flow. To fulfill this basic obligation:

1- The wife must be faithful, trustworthy, and honest.

2- She must not deceive her mate by deliberately avoiding conception lest it deprive him of legitimate progeny.

3- She must not allow any other person to have access to that which is exclusively the husband's right, i.e. sexual intimacy.

4-She must not receive anyone in his home whom the husband does not like.

5-She may not accept their gifts without his approval. This is probably meant to avoid jealousy, suspicion, gossip, etc., and also to maintain the integrity of all parties concerned.

6- The husband's possessions are her trust. If she has access to any portion thereof, or if she is entrusted with any fund, she must discharge her duty wisely and thriftily. She may not lend or dispose of any of his belongings without his permission.

7- With respect to intimacy, the wife is to make herself desirable; to be attractive, responsive, and cooperative.

8- A wife may not deny herself to her husband, for the Qur'an speaks of them as a comfort to each other. Due consideration is, of course, given to health and decency.

9- Moreover, the wife is not permitted to do anything that may render her companionship less desirable or less gratifying. If she neglects herself, the husband has the right to interfere with her freedom to rectify the situation and insure maximum self-fulfillment for both partners. She is not permitted to do anything on his part that may impede her gratification.


Allah Almighty knows best.
____________________________________________________________________________
Source: Excerpted with some modifications from Islam in Focus by Hammudah `Abd al-`Ati’s republished in Islam online

Friday, February 26, 2010

Backbiting and Slander.

Backbiting and Slander.

In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;
All the praise and Thanks are due to Allāh, the Lord of the al-ā’lamīn. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam, is His Messenger.

The Holy Qur’an forbids all forms of backbiting and slander. And Allah says, “And why did you not, when you heard it, say? It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to Allah, this is a most serious slander" [Surah An-Nur, 24:16]

 It is very  Destructive .

Islam forbids lies, suspicion, spying, backbiting, belittling, gossiping and slandering against the others. Such actions are totally unacceptable in lslam. They are considered amongst the most destructive of major sins as these sins sow enmity and discord among the Ummah. It will cause hostilities between people of the same household, and between neighbors, friends and relatives.

Islam commands that our relationship with mankind should be conducted on basis of sincerity and responsibility. It emphasizes in respecting others for the honor, reputation and privacy. Islam stress that we are accountable for our own attitudes, conducts, actions and anything which we have control or influence over, in our society or the world around us.

Allah Forbids Backbiting, Belittling, Defaming, Suspicion, Spying.

“O you who believe! Let not some men among you laugh at others: it may be that the [latter] are better than the former; Nor let some women laugh at others; it may be that the [latter] are better than the [former]; Nor defame nor be sarcastic to each other, nor call each other by [offensive] nicknames; ill-seeming is a name connoting wickedness [to be used of one] after he has believed: And those who do not desist are [indeed] doing wrong.” [Al- Hujurat, 49:11]

“O you who believe! Avoid suspicion as much [as possible]: for suspicion in some cases is a sin; and spy not on each other, nor speak ill of each other behind their backs [backbiting]. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, you would abhor it… But fear Allah; for Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful.” [Al- Hujurat, 49:12]

Narrated by Abu Hurayrah, The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) said:

"Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look for the others' faults and do not spy, and do not be jealous of one another, and do not desert (severe your relation with) one another, and do not hate one another; and O Allah's worshipers! Be brothers (as Allah has ordered you!) "[Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 73, Number 90]

And Allah the Exalted says: "... And conjecture is of no use against the truth" [An-Najm, 53:28]

A brief reflect over this assimilation it should be a clear message for us to keep away from backbiting!

Do Not Treat Backbiting and Slander With Indifference.

“Behold, you received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things which you had no knowledge; and you thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of Allah” [An-Nur, 24: 15]

Many of us back bite and gossip without thinking. We think it is a minor matter. However, Allah reminds us to be extra careful as the smallest sin is in fact very big in the sight of Allah!

Speak Out Against Slander And Try To Put A Stop To It.

“And why did you not, when you heard it, say? It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to Allah, this is a most serious slander" [Surah An-Nur, 24:16]

Many people are so busy spreading the slander they hear that they do not even stop to think if it is true or not.

Syaitan to Create Conflict and Hatred.

Allah Says,:“Say to My servants that they should only say those things that are best, for Satan does sow dissensions among them, for Satan is to man an avowed enemy.” [Surah Al-Isra’, 17:53]

Are we falling into Syaitan's [Satan's] trap? We can all analyze ourselves.

Allah states: “You have indeed in the Messenger of Allah an excellent pattern of conduct”. [Surah Al-Ahzab, 33:21)

The Definition of Backbiting and Slander.

Prophet Muhammad (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: “Do you know what backbiting is?" They said, "Allah and His Messenger know best." He then said, "It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike." Someone asked him, "But what if what I say is true?" The Messenger of Allah said, "If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him." [Muslim]

We should guard our tongue from sins and use our limbs in acts of obedience

Prophet Muhammad (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: "Who protects his tongue from unlawful utterances and his private parts from illegal sexual intercourse; I shall guarantee him entrance into Paradise." [Bukhari and Muslim]

The Best Muslim.

"I asked the Messenger of Allah(Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam): Who is the best Muslim? The Messenger of Allah (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) replied, "He is the one from whom Muslims are safe from the evil of his tongue and hands." [Muslim]

Deriding others in their presence by making negative facial expressions or by hand gestures while they are unaware is also a form of backbiting.

Beware Of the Slipping Of Our Tongues

"When man wakes up in the morning each day, all parts of the body warn the tongue saying, ‘Fear Allah as regards us for we are at your mercy; if you are upright, we will be upright and if you are crooked, we become crooked.’" [At-Tirmidzi]

Summary

The practice of backbiting and slander is widespread phenomena today and it is an avenue for expressing their anger, misgivings and jealousy. It should be aware that those who indulge in backbiting are oblivious that they are not doing justice at all but only harming themselves. This is because on the Day of Resurrection both the wrongdoer and the wronged will stand before Allah SWT, Who is the Just Judge, Allah will then bestow the wronged person from the good deeds of the person who wronged him in accordance with his wrong by backbiting.

But some situations allow us to inform others of what someone has done. It is allowed for us to inform the authorities only when someone conducts injustice to the others. It is also allowed for us to inform someone who could stop a perpetrator from committing further vice. It is also permissible for us to tell whoever seeks our advice on a person for business dealings or marriage. In this case it is not allowed for us to hide what we know about the person so that the enquirer will not be deceived. Only  these types of conduct of talking about others are lawful; the rest is forbidden.

Islam teaches us that if people are being ridiculed or backbite in our presence, we should defend their honor. If we neglect this, we shall be depriving ourselves of ever needed help and mercy from Allah. If a fellow Muslim brother is slandered in his presence, and he is capable of defending him and does so, God will defend him in this world and in the next. But if he fails to defend him, God will destroy him in this world and the next. [Baghawi].

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Consequences of the Tongue



Keeping away from Hell, Gates of Goodness, Basis for Jannah.

Mu'adz bin Jabal (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I inquired the Messenger of Allah (PBUH): “Inform me of an act which will cause me to enter Jannah and keep me far from Hell.''

He (PBUH) replied, "You have asked me about a matter of great importance, but it is easy for one for whom Allah makes it easy.''
He added, " Worship Allah, associate nothing with Him in worship, offer As-Solat (the prayer), pay the Zakat, observe Saum (fasting) during Ramadan and perform Hajj (pilgrimage) to the House of Allah, if you can afford it.''

He (PBUH) further said, "Shall I not guide you to the Gates of Goodness?" Fasting is a screen (from Hell), charity extinguishes (i.e., removes) the sins as water extinguishes fire, and standing in prayers by a slave of Allah during the last third part of the night (qiyamulail).'' Then he recited: "Their sides forsake their beds, to invoke their Rabb in fear and hope, and they spend (in charity in Allah's Cause) out of what We have bestowed on them. No person knows what is kept hidden for them of joy as a reward for what they used to do.'' (Surah Sajdah, 32:17, 18)

Then he added, "Shall I tell you of the root of the matter, its pillar and its highest point?'' I replied: "Yes! Certainly, O Prophet of Allah.'' He said, "The root of this matter (foundation) is Islam, its pillar (mainstay is) As-Solat (the prayer) and its highest point is Jihad (fighting in the Cause of Allah).''

Then he said, "Shall I tell you of that which holds all these things?'' I said: "Yes, O Messenger of Allah.'' So he took hold of his tongue and said, "Keep this in control.'' I asked: "O Messenger of Allah! Shall we really be accounted for what we talk about?'' He replied, "May your mother lose you! People will be thrown on their faces into the Hell on account of their tongues.''

[At-Tirmidzi]

Commentary: Besides describing Articles of Islam, this Hadith mentions the dangers which lie in the careless use of the tongue. All good actions can go waste if one does not guard his speech. One should, therefore, guard his tongue against that which Allah has made prohibited, (but keep your tongue wet with the remembrance of Allah (zikrullah).

[Excerpted from Riyad-us-Saliheen, Book Seventeen- The Book of the Prohibited Actions Wponline.Org ]

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Self-centered?


What is Self centered?


Main Entry:
self-centered
Part of Speech:
adjective
Definition:
absorbed with oneself~

concerned solely or chiefly with one's own interests, welfare, etc.; engrossed in self; selfish; egotistical.
• independent, self-sufficient.
• centered in oneself or itself.
• Archaic. fixed; unchanging.

Also, especially British, self-centred.

Origin: 1670–80

—Related forms
self•cen•tered•ly, adverb
self•cen•tered•ness, noun
unself-centered, adjective


Synonyms:
• egocentric,
• egoistic,
• egomaniacal,
• egotistic, egotistical,
• grandstanding,
• having a swelled head,
• independent,
• inward-looking,
• know-it-all,
• narcissistic,
• on an ego trip,
• self-absorbed,
• self-indulgent,
• self-interested,
• self-involved,
• self-seeking,
• self-serving,
• self-sufficient,
• selfish,
• stuck on oneself,
• wrapped up with oneself


Antonyms:
• benevolent,
• giving,
• unselfish


Dictionary.com Unabridged
Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2010.

Beware of Jealousy or Hasad

"Beware of jealousy, for verily it destroys good deeds the way fire destroys wood."

Hasad (jealousy , envy) is among the most destructive emotions or feeling which a man may have towards his fellow human being. It causes him to wish evil for others and to be happy when misfortune befalls them. The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) warned against envy by comparing it to fire that completely burns the wood.

The Prophet s.a.w said: "Beware of jealousy, for verily it destroys good deeds the way fire destroys wood." [Abu Dawud]

Hasad is a disease of the heart and it causes impurity to the heart. When Allah's Messenger s.a.w was asked who the best of people are? He (s.a.w) replied: "the one with a clean heart and truthful tongue."They asked: 'We understand a truthful tongue, but what does a clean heart mean?' he answered: 'It is the heart of one that is pious, pure, and is free of sin, transgressions, hatred and Hasad." [Ibn Majah]

Hasad is such a dangerous characteristic that Allah revealed verses of the Qur’an to be recited as a protection from the jealous,

"Say: I seek refuge in the Lord of the dawn… from the evil of envious when he envies." [Surah al-Falaq, 113: 1]

Al-Zubayr Ibn al-Awam reported that the Prophet s.a.w said: "There has come to you the disease of the nations before you, jealousy and hatred. This is the 'shaver' (destroyer); I do not say that it shaves hair, but that it shaves (destroys) faith…" [(Classified as Hasan) Jami at- Tirmidzi (2434)]

Hasad can cause the person to indulge in disbelief because it causes the individual to feel that Allah has not been fair with him; he forgets all the mercy and blessings which Allah has bestowed upon him. The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "They are enemies for Allah's bounties." They asked: "Who are they?" He said: "Those who envy people for what Allah has given them of Bounty." [At-Tabarani]

Allah s.w.t through His Absolute Wisdom has given some people with wealth, intelligence, beauty, strength, children, etc. than others. The believing Muslim should be grateful to Allah favored him; but patiently strive to gain a better ground; and trust what Allah will destined for him.

Allah s.w.t says:

• "Allah favored some of you over others with wealth and properties… Do they deny the favors of Allah?" [Surah an-Nahl, 16: 71]
• "Do they envy men for what Allâh has given them of His Bounty?" [Surah an-Nisa,4: 54]
• "It is We Who portion out between them their livelihood in this world, and We raised some of them above others in ranks, so that some may employ others in their work. But the mercy of your Lord is better." [Surah az-Zukhruf (43): 32]

The mercy of Allah is much better than the convenience of the world. The materials of this life do not make one superior to another in Allah's Judgment. True superiority lies in Taqwa (righteousness, fear of Allah).

Allah s.w.t Says:

• "Surely, the most noble of you to Allah is the most God-fearing." [Surah al-Hujurat,49: 13]
• "And the Hereafter with Your Lord is (only) for those who have Taqwa." [Surah az-Zukhruf,43: 35]

What belongs to the transient world is of no significance before Allah s.w.t. The Prophet s.a.w said: "If this world were worth a mosquito's wing before Allah, He would not give a disbeliever a drink of water." [At-Tirmidzi]

The favors of Allah s.w.t in the world are a test; the more the favors, the more the tests. Al-Hasan al-Basri said: "Umar Ibn Khattab wrote this letter to Abu Musa al-Ash'ari, 'Be content with your provision in this world, for the Most Merciful has honored some of His servants over others in terms of provision as a test of both. The one who has been given plenty is being tested to see if he will give thanks to Allah and fulfill the duties which are his by virtue of his wealth…" [Ibn Hatim]

Allah, the Exalted, has therefore forbidden us from desiring what other have, "Do not wish for what we have favored some of you over others." [Surah an-Nisa, 4: 32]

In order to discourage envy, the Prophet s.a.w said: "Do not look to those above you. Look to those below you, as it will more likely remind you of Allah's favors bestowed on you." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] On another occasion, he said: "If one of you looks at someone wealthier and better built than him, he should also look at someone of lesser than himself." [Muslim]

The mercy of Allah is much better than the convenience of the world.The materials of this life do not make one superior to another in Allah's Judgment. The True superiority of a person lies in his Taqwa: righteousness, fear of Allah. Allah says: "Surely, the most noble of you to Allah is the most God-fearing." [Surah al-Hujurat, 49: 13] "And the Hereafter with Your Lord is (only) for those who have Taqwa." [Surah az-Zukhruf, 43: 35]

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Etiquette in the Mosque

It is an evil deed to disturb others in the Mosque.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

How should one behave, especially in a masjid, when the Adzan is being called? Are we allowed to talk worldly affairs while it is being called? Are we allowed to exchange "Salam" (greetings) while it is being called?

Praise be to Allah, Lord of the al’aalameen.

Al-Hakim reported in Al-Mustadrak (4/359) that Anas Ibn Malik RA said: “The Messenger of Allah SAW said:

‘There will come a time when people will sit in circles in the mosques and they will have no concern except this world. Allah has no need of them so do not sit with them.’”

This is a sahih hadith even though al-Bukhari and Muslim did not narrate it. Al-Dhahabi said in Al-Talkhis that it is sahih.

This hadith states that this blameworthy deed is disliked, because the mosques are not built for such a purpose. Allah commanded that mosques should be built to remember Him and to conduct prayers and acts of worship and obedience to Him, such as I’tikaf (retreat, seclusion for devotion and worship), and different kinds of zikir such as circles for reciting Qur’an and seeking knowledge.

On the other hand, there are hadith that command us to repeat the words of the adzan after the muezzin, as a mustahabb or encouraged deed, and to set an example of how one should behave when hearing the adzan. Some people neglect it, and do not realize how much reward they are missing out on and how much they are to blame for that. What sort of hearts must they have?! They hear the remembrance of Allah then they turn away from Him, and it has no effect on their hearts so that they may fear Him and feel compelled to listen.

One of these hadith is that narrated by Imam Muslim in his Sahih from ‘Amr Ibn Al-‘Aas RA, who said that he heard the Prophet SAW say: “When any one of you hears the muezzin, let him say something like he says, then send blessings on me, for whoever sends blessings on me, Allah will send blessings tenfold on him. Then ask Allah to grant me Al-wasilah, for it is a status in Paradise that only one of Allah’s slaves will attain, and I hope that I will be the one. Whoever asks for Al-wasilah for me, will be granted my intercession for him.” [Muslim 384]

As for giving the greeting of salaam and shaking hands, there is nothing wrong with this, for these are acts of obedience to Allah. There is no conflict between doing these things and responding to the muezzin, because a person may do all of these things at once.

Muslims should beware of doing anything that may offend or disturb those who come to the mosque for worship. This includes disturbing those who are reading Qur’an, praying or remembering Allah in the mosque.

It is an evil deed (sayi’ah) to disturb the people in the mosque by talking about worldly affairs, because this is offensive to them and distracts Muslims from doing acts of worship properly.

Disturbing others is not allowed, even if it takes the form of reading Qur’an, more so how about if it takes other forms.

Ahmad Ibn Shu’aib An-Nasa’ie reported in Al-Sunan Al-Kubra (5/32) under the heading Zikir Qawl Al-Nabi SAW Laa yajhar ba’dukam ‘ala ba’din fi’l-Qur’an (Mentioning the statement of the Prophet SAW, None of you should compete with one another in reciting Qur’an loudly), a report from Abu Hazim Al-Timar from Al-Bayadi, that the Prophet SAW went into i’tikaf (seclusion or retreat for worship) in the mosque, and he heard them reciting Qur’an in loud voices while some praying. He pulled the curtain and said:

“The one who is praying is conversing with his Lord, so let him think about what he is saying to Him. Do not compete with one another in reciting Qur’an loudly.”

Ibn Muhairiz RA is reported to have said: “Speaking in the mosque is idle talk, except for one who is praying, or remembering his Lord, or asking for help or giving help.” [Musannaf ‘Abd al-Razzaq, part 8, Bab Kalam ‘Ikrimah].

Ibn Al-Hajj said, concerning the manners of the Muslim when he sets out for the mosque: “He should intend to avoid idle talk in the mosque or talking about that which does not concern him, for there is a report that says that speaking in the mosque about anything but the deeds of the Hereafter is like fire in dry wood, it eats up hasanat (good deeds). So he should take care to avoid that, lest he goes out to engage in trade and comes back having lost everything because of his idle talk.” [Al-Madkhal by Ibn Al-Hajj, part 1, Al-Sunnah fi’l-Mashiy ila’l-Masjid].

And Allah knows best.

®Islam Q&A

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Good Deeds that could be done to increase Hasanāt.

Some illustration of Good Deeds

Question: Please enlighten me on some examples of Good Deeds that we can do every day to increase our Hasanāt.

In the Name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;
All the praise and Thanks are due to Allāh, the Lord of the al-ā’lamīn. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, sallallāhu alayhi wa sallam, is His Messenger.

If Allah blesses anyone to perform good deeds, he would earn a great deal of reward. There are many kinds of righteous deeds that can be offered by rich and poor, old and young, male and female, depending on each person’s circumstances, ambition and energy, after the help of Allah.

Allah says:

“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)” [Al-Nahl, 16:97]

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) that the Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “Hasten to do good deeds before there come tribulations like pieces of a dark night, when a man will be a believer in the morning and a kafir by evening, or he will be a believer in the evening and a kafir by morning, selling his religious commitment for worldly gain.” [Muslim, 118]

The kinds of good deeds that a person could offer daily include the following:

1 – Praying in Congregation in the Mosque.

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) that the Prophet (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam)  said: “Whoever goes to the mosque in the morning and evening, Allah will prepare for him an honourable place in Paradise every time he goes and comes.” [Al-Bukhari, 631; Muslim, 669]

2- Performing Optional Prayers.

The mother of the faithful Umm Habibah Ramlah binti Abu Sufyan (Radiallāhu ‘anha) narrated that she heard the Prophet (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) saying: “A house will be built in paradise for every Muslim who offers twelve Rak’ah of optional solāh other than the obligatory solāh in day and night, to seek pleasure of Allah.” [Muslim]

Note : these extra 12 rak’ats of optional prayers, according to Imam Nasa’i and Tirmidzi are : 2 rak’ats before the obligatory prayer of Early morning (fajar), and 4 rak’ats before (Zuhur) and 2 rak’ats after it ,and 2 rak’ats after the obligatory of early evening prayer (maghrib) and 2 rak’ats after the obligatory prayer of night (Isha') prayer.

Abu Hurairah (radiallāhu`anhu) narrated that the Prophet (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: “[Voluntary] Solāh is the best thing that one can do, so perform as many as you possibly can” (At-Tabarani). “Prostrate as much as you can, because whenever you prostrate, Allah elevates your rank by a degree and wipes out a sin from your record” [Muslim].

Rasullullah (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) also said “Two light rak’at which you may think as insignificant to add to you deeds, it is better for you than possessing the whole world” [Ibn Al-Mubarak]

Performing the Qiyamulail.

The Qiyamulail or Tahajjud Prayer will draw us closer to Allah Among the hadiths that describe the virtues of this act of worship is the hadith of Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu), in which the Prophet (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: The best of prayers after the prescribed prayers is prayer in the depths of the night, and the best of fasting after the month of Ramadhān is fasting the month of Allah, Muharram.” [Muslim].

‘Abdallah Ibn ‘Amr (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) reported that the Prophet (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “The most beloved of prayer to Allah is the prayer of Dawud, and the most beloved of fasts to Allah is the fast of Dawud. He used to sleep for half of the night, then get up and pray for a third of the night, then sleep for a sixth of the night, and he used to fast every other day.” [Al-Bukhari, Muslim and others].

3– Attending Funerals and Offering the Funeral Prayer.

It was narrated that Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) said: The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “Whoever attends a funeral until he offers the (funeral) prayer will have one qirāt (of reward) and whoever attends until the burial is done will have two qirāt.” It was said: “What are the two qirāts?” He said: “Like two great mountains.” [Al-Bukhari, 1261; Muslim, 945]

4 – Recite a lot of the Supplication of Tahlīlah.

Say “Lā ilāha ill-Allāh wahdahu lāsharīka lah, lahu’l-mulk wa lahu’l-hamd wa huwa ‘ala kulli shay’in qadīr"-- (There is no god but Allah alone, with no partner or associate; His is the Dominion, to Him be all praise, and He is able to do all things)” one hundred times each day. It is the best supplication to remember Allah.

It is described to us in the Hadith of the Messenger (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam), he said: "...and the best (supplication) I and the other prophets who were sent who were sent before me proclaimed was: “Lā ilāha ill Allāh, Wahdahu Lāsyarikalah, Lahul mulku walLahul hamdu yuhyi wa yumīt, Wa huwa ‘alā kulli shay'in qadīr." -- "There is no deity worthy of worship but Allah, He is Alone and has no partner. To Him belongs the Ownership (of everything), and to Him belongs all Praise, and He has total power over all things." [At-Tirmidzi]

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) that the Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam)  said: “Whoever says Lā ilāha ill-Allāh wahdahu lāsharīka lah, lahu’l-mulk wa lahu’l-hamd wa huwa ‘ala kulli shay’in qadīr one hundred times in a day, it will be as if he freed ten slaves, and one hundred hasanāt (good deeds) will be recorded for him, and one hundred sayi’at (bad deeds) will be erased from him, and it will be a protection for him against the Shaytaan all that day until evening comes. No one can do anything better than that except one who does more.” [Al-Bukhari, 3119; Muslim, 2691]

5 – Continue honouring your parents after they die and Upholding the Ties of Kinship.

It was narrated that Anas ibn Malik (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) say: “Whoever would like his provision to be increased and his lifespan extended, let him uphold his ties of kinship.” [Al-Bukhari, 5639; Muslim, 2557]

In another hadith Abu Usaid Malik bin Rabi`ah As-Sa`idi (Radiallāhu`anhu) reported: We were sitting with Messenger of Allah (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) when a man of Banu Salamah came to him and asked, “O Messenger of Allāh, is there anything that I can do to continue honouring my parents after they die?” He (Sallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: “'Yes, you can invoke blessings on them, forgiveness for them, fulfill their last wishes (wasiyah or will), honour their friends and uphold the ties of kinship which you would not have were it not for them (i.e. parents).” [Abu Dawud].

6 – Observing Voluntary Fasts, Visiting the Sick and Giving Charity.

It was narrated that Abu Hurairah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) said: The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “Who among you is fasting today?” Abu Bakar (Radiallāhu‘anhu) said: “I am.” He said: “Who among you has attended a funeral today?” Abu Bakar said: “I have.” He said: “Who among you has fed a poor person today?’ Abu Bakar said: “I have.” He said: “Who among you has visited a sick person today?” Abu Bakar said: “I have.” The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “These (traits) are not combined in a person but he will enter Paradise.” [Muslim, 1028]

6 – Glorifying Allah SWT.

Recite Subhān Allāh wa bi hamdih, Subhān Allāh il a’dzīm (Praise and glory be to Allah) one hundred times.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) said: The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “Whoever says Subhān Allāh wa bi hamdih Subhān Allāh il a’dzīm (Praise and glory be to Allah) one hundred times, morning and evening, his sins will be erased even if they are like the foam of the sea.” [Al-Bukhari, 6042; Muslim, 2691]

7 – Recite the Tasbih, Tahmid And Takbīr, And Enjoining What Is Good And Forbidding What Is Evil, And Praying Duha.

It was narrated from Abu Dharr that the Prophet (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “For every bone of the son of Adam a charity must be given each day. Every tasbīhah [saying Subhānallāh (Glory be to Allah)] is a charity, every tahmīdah [saying al-hamdu Lillāh (praise be to Allah)] is a charity, every tahlālah [saying Lā ilāha ill-Allāh (There is no god but Allah)] is a charity, every takbīrah [saying Allahu akbar [Allah is Most Great]) is a charity, enjoining what is good is a charity, forbidding what is evil is a charity, and two raka’hs offered in the mid-morning (Duha) is most rewarding.” [Muslim, 720]

8 – Reciting Qur’an.

‘Abdallah ibn Mas’ūd (Radiallāhu ‘anhu) said: The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “Whoever reads a letter of the Book of Allah will be credited with a good deed and a good deed gets a tenfold reward. I do not say that Alif-Laam-Meem is a letter, rather Alif is a letter, Laam is a letter and Meem is a letter.” [Al-Tirmidzi, 2910; he said it is hasan sahih; classified as sahih by Al-Albani]

And there are many other good deeds. The Muslim should seek the help of his Lord to do good deeds, and do his best to do them. He should persist in doing these good deeds even if they are little, for that is better than doing a lot of good deeds then stopping.

It was narrated that ‘Aishah (Radiallāhu ‘anha) said: The Messenger of Allah (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “O people, you should do whatever good deeds you can, for Allah does not get tired (of giving reward) until you get tired. And the most beloved of good deeds to Allah is that in which a person persists, even if it is little. If the family of Muhammad (sallallāhu `alayhi wa sallam) started to do something, they would persist in it.” [Al-Bukhari, 43; Muslim, 782]

And Allah the Exalted Knows best.

[Via Islam QA]